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Miscellaneous

Hello! I’m not ready to reveal myself as anything but a semi-regular contributor of secrets, including the latest one with Jacob and “butter”. (By the way, great job with the confession. I was surprised that all the text could fit into it.) I noticed that some people were confused as to why it’s not butter. All I’ll say is that it’s not butter, but it does have a… buttery taste, and it sizzles, ready for anything. (It’s hot down here in hell. Think their AC system is broken or something.)

August 27, 2016

Sweet buttery goodness, anon, you really do not want me to forget about That Iconic Ad, do you?

Thank goodness it’s just butter, though. I don’t even want to think about Jacob narrating this ad for chocolate for example. Interestingly, that ad uses ASMR which is mostly relaxing, but sometimes… I’ll just say for the record that if Paul Amos does an ASMR video you would likely not hear from me for a month because I’ll be stuck in my room looking like this

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~ Signora Paola

Miscellaneous

Yooo people should submit porn gifs that remind them of the assassins, like how they’d fuck or their fav position or something <3 <3 <3

August 27, 2016

Well, that would certainly be quite a challenge! But I’m not certain how to categorise those submissions. Maybe we should have a Sinful GIF day or something. I will need to confer with the others about this. 🙂

For now, I tried to look for any gifs and it was difficult for me to find appropriate ones. Oh, it is easy to look for porn gifs; you only need to search for them on Google. But what makes them difficult is finding good ones that aren’t too hardcore (if you notice we still censor the really naughty bits in the images here). Add to that difficulty is finding a “look-a-like” (which is nigh impossible lol). So, at best, I could find ones that could “tease” you into thinking that the person in the GIFs is your favourite Assassin/Templar ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I am posting these GIFs here primarily because I want our patrons to be “inspired” by them. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Sometimes, the sinful mind needs a bit of the visuals to be truly creative~ ;D

All of the GIFs are under the cut, so please make sure you won’t get into trouble viewing these! ♥

~ Signora Paola

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Miscellaneous

Signora Paola.. YOU! THAT CONFESSION ABOUT JACOB MASTURBATING! THAT PIC! YOU INCITE ME TO SIN! (Anyway I’d ride Jacob making him moan my name if I saw him in that state,of course)

August 27, 2016

That’s the idea, my dear anon. We do like to inspire sinning here at La Rosa in Fiore, for it is our lifeblood. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

~ Signora Paola

Miscellaneous

I’m almost certain that most (or even all) of Jacob’s Sinday confessions are made by Signora Paola, I don’t know why 😏😏😏

August 21, 2016
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If it’s not the wordiness and the absolute thirst that drips from every pore of those confessions, then I’ve no idea what else could tip you off, my dear anon 😈

~ Signora Paola

DACS Greatest Hits

August 20, 2016

Thank you very much for participating in our What kind of dirty things they would say during sex ask meme! ♥

Interestingly enough (and we just remembered this!), Paola has answered a somewhat similar dirty ask before: How does each Assassin give dirty talk? So, our replies here are based from that post (please do read it if you haven’t already!)

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His reticence could be an obstacle; he would prefer to make sounds rather than actually say words, mainly because his mind could get too overloaded with pleasure that he couldn’t really say anything… in English anyway. When he does say something, it would be in his native language. The dirtier the words are (which would be about how good you feel around him), the more he’d use Mohawk. And if you ask him what it means later, he’d be too embarrassed and shy to tell you what it is. Why? Because Connor, the sweet gentleman he is, would think that what he said during the heat of the moment was too disrespectful for you. You’d have to reassure him that he would never upset you, no matter how dirty his words got. ;D

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Well, Paola has very specific ideas what he would say ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) But while we think he’d be very good in describing what he’s feeling, he’d focus more on describing how you look like. He knows exactly how his words and voice affect you, so he wants you completely flustered and under his control. What better way to do it than to do a running commentary on how you’re reacting to his lovemaking? Of course, he has his own limits; you’d know that he’s really close when he is reduced to grunting and groaning. Which is why it’s usually better for him to do the dirty talk when he’s fingering you. Not only could he keep his focus and make you crazy with his words, but he could keep a very close eye on you and describe in vivid detail how you look like trembling underneath him.

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He’s less about describing what he feels or how you look like and more about giving you orders, urging you to kiss and touch him, and being very vocal when you do it just right. 😉 And he would want you to join him in the dirty talk by asking you how it feels, how much you’re enjoying it. And if you’re feeling a little shy to do it, then Altaïr would keep encouraging you, shifting his dirty talk from giving you orders to saying (in an increasingly indecent manner) how you good you feel around him, how you’re driving him crazy the way you sound like moaning his name. And when he tells you that your voice drives him crazy with lust, can you really deny him the pleasure? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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Of course his vocabulary would be peppered with modern day dirty talk (and he might even use a couple of corny ones, but you’d still love him for it anyway~). And since he fortunately lives in an era where sexting is a thing, you should definitely expect him to start doing the dirty talk in his messages to you. Like Altaïr he likes to add a bit of a dominant streak to his dirty talk, so expect him to instruct you specifically how to, say, suck his cock. 8D And if he’s really feeling it, we think that of all the characters here he would potentially say the kinkiest things. Maybe he’d say something so kinky in the heat of the moment that it could bring you out of the moment, but he would be willing to talk it over to you after. Maybe you’d find a secret kink of his this way. 😉

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Like Connor, we think he would prefer to make sounds rather than words, but if you tell him that it turns you on so much to hear him do dirty talk, he would do his very best to give you what you want. He would be a little unsure about it first; maybe he would just say something sweet like, “You’re so beautiful like this.” But as his confidence grows, he would get more… graphic. The more graphic it is, the more he reverts to his native language. Like think of the dirtiest things one could say in French and Arno would’ve said them at some point. Good for you if you understand him; unlucky if you don’t, because we think he’d be all smug and secretive about the meaning. You’d have to learn French to understand it. ;D

DACS Greatest Hits

What would our Assassins (and Templars, why not?) cook for their beloved one for first time?

August 15, 2016

(As a reminder, we are not accepting requests for headcanons right now. This ask has been in our Drafts for so long–heaven knows how long ago we received this–and we really apologise for the tardiness of our response!)

Desmond: He’d probably do something super hip NYC fusion food of whatever, because fusion food is hip and cool and fits into the bar & nightclub scene that he works at (before he got kidnapped by Abstergo)

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Altaïr: Shawarma, the Middle Eastern equivalent of the ‘burrito’.

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He’d pull off an Iron Man and take his beloved to Shawarma Palace after kicking some butt lmao

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Ezio: The most molto bene pene pasta ever ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) okay maybe he’ll save the pene pasta for much much later lol…nah instead he’d make Ravioli Nudi

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Connor: Tekarihstóyen (Mohawk for ‘Fry bread’–or should I say FRYE Bread? *shot* Mind you, I keep on typing “Frye Bread” into the search engines now lmao). Sooooo unhealthy but SO GOOD. Dip it in honey and it taste even better hnnnngh just make sure to not eat it all the time lol.

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Tagging @thenoahwatts because this reminded me of that one time on his Twitch channel, where half of us would always end up steering the Twich chat convo into food or porn…or both…

Aveline: Jambalaya yum yum yum mmmm or seafood gumbo YUMMY

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Edward: Welsh Cakes. Perfect for breakfast~

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Adéwalé: Callaloo. It’s a traditional Caribbean dish that has West African roots. Very tasty and full of greens~

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Shay: Irish stew. Simple but super delish and meaty~

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Haytham: Tarragon chicken salad tea sandwiches, for tea time~

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Arno: Puits d’amour ♥

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Shao Jun: Chinese hot pot! Aw man she’d not only be cooking for her beloved, but also for their entire family as well lol. She’d invite them all to her house and they’d be going at it for 6 hours straight, sitting there and eating this hot pot meal. I mean you can literally make this into a 21-course meal almost I mean just look at all that food it’s almost like Korean BBQ or Japanese Yakiniku YUM

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Arbaaz: Chicken Tikka Masala. Super delicious chicken meal, packed with aromatic Indian spices. I think Evie would love it lol it’s like British-Indian fusion almost~

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Evie: Beef Wellington. I think it’s one of her special recipes she reserves for Christmas. Just watching this video is making me want one soooo bad

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Jacob: Buttered toast, burnt at the edges. ~/o/ Okay, okay. Maybe he’d actually try to make something more complicated for his significant other, so a nice full English breakfast. (Just expect some parts to be a little bit burnt.)

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Thank you for making us hungry. 8V

Miscellaneous

Noootttt a confession but I reALLY hate the way I can be attempting to get on with a normal life and then I play Syndicate again ONCE after a little break and BOOM. I’m a Jacob sinful mess all over again. Needless to say this afternoon was spent trawling through the Jacob tag on the blog 😏😏😏 amen for DirtyAssCreedSecrets and the beautiful admin who uphold it 👏🏻 not forgetting the fabulous sinners who keep our places in hell firmly reserved 👍🏻

August 15, 2016

There’s just no escape from Jacob’s Temptation, my friend. Everyone – and I do mean, everyone – who stands within his radius is bound to fall for his charms as clearly illustrated here~

Please do keep the beautiful sins coming! Remember that we wouldn’t have gotten this far without you. We couldn’t have asked for better patrons (´∀`)♡

Love,
~ Signora Paola

Miscellaneous

Not a dirty confession, but Evie has the perfect nose for Eskimo kissing. Don’t you just wanna rub the tip of your sniffer up against hers like two little bunny rabbits? Sorry, the adorableness of the thought is getting to me.

August 12, 2016
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This sounds so damn cute!!~♥
I can imagine Evie giving eskimo smooches all the time. Yet I must remind, that we’re a dirty confession blog 😉

Juicy details is what we love to receive from you! ♥

Stay awesome and take care, lovely!
-Sister Teodora. ♥

DACS Greatest Hits

August 11, 2016

We are not taking any more requests!

Thank you for very much for participating in Which song do we associate with a character? ask meme


Pearl: Maneater by Daryl Hall & John Oates
Altaïr: Losing My Religion by R.E.M.

~ Signora Paola (who will also sing these in karaoke; she’s probably the most karaoke crazy among the mods~)


Pearl: Empire by Alpines
Altaïr: Arsonist’s Lullabye by Hozier

~Claudia


Pearl: Cool Girl by Tove Lo
Altaïr: All Apologies by Nirvana

~ Caterina