Browsing Tag

someone take photoshop away from signora paola please

Miscellaneous

Not a confession but looking at Shay’s underwear choice for a male lover, and me being a die hard Shay x Haytham shipper, can we just take a moment to imagine the Grand Master in those!? 😂😘

December 18, 2016

*coughs*

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~ Signora Paola (who is now running as fast as possible because she’s certain Mr. Kenway is out to get her head)

Confessions

November 25, 2016

‘Jacob is a vampire and Connor is a werewolf. Both of them share me as I’m their mate in and out of the wedlock, where we make love so wildly. Only thinking of them like that made me feel so wet and horny!

Confession [x]

Confessions, Paola's Choice

August 26, 2016

‘Because I like fashion, I’ve always wanted to have a photo-studio style apartment where I can photograph my own outfits and invite my friends for a photo-shoot. I manage to persuade Jacob to model for me and let me style him. I apply dark red lipstick and black eyeliner on him and dress him in a luxurious suit. To my delight Jacob turns out to be very photogenic. Lights around the apartment are dimmed, just the two of us in silence with only the sounds of my camera’s shutter. I get increasingly turned on watching Jacob do different poses, loosen his tie, do a boyish snarl with his hands in his tousled hair, smudge the side of his lipstick with his hand, take off his jacket…

At one point I say, ‘Hold up,’ go to the bathroom, come back with a bucket of water and before Jacob can stop me I pour it on him and say, ‘Continue.’ He’s annoyed with me at first but then quickly gets into it with more erotic poses and expressions. His wet shirt is clinging to his chiseled torso, his hair is drenched and messy, and water is dripping down his face. The more I look at his wet lips coated in flaming red lipstick and his eyes made darker and accentuated by the eyeliner, I get almost obsessed with wanting to see him like this all the time. A touch of femininity added to his very masculine demeanour does wonders for my arousal. I put the camera on continuous shooting on the tripod, go up to him, push him against the wall and kiss him fervently. Just tasting my own lipstick on Jacob’s lips makes me growl and I unintentionally start biting into his lips like I want to eat them. He grabs my ass and presses me against his damp body. To stop my biting he pulls my head away by my hair and just seeing how smudged his lipstick is all around his mouth, my eyes grow wider with hunger, I breathe rapidly and bare my teeth.

Jacob doesn’t often see me act so predatory to the point that he has to restrain me like a mad dog, and when he does, he knows he stumbled across one of my biggest kinks. Jacob kneads my body and roughly bites and kisses my neck, leaving sloppy lipstick marks all over my skin. He bites my ear and cheeks and purrs, ‘Naughty girl, you were planning for this to happen, weren’t you?’ I respond ominously, ‘Quit playing around and fuck me or I’ll bite your pretty lips off.’ My threats always humour him so he grins before throwing me on the floor and taking me right there while my camera continues capturing every frame. I’ve always had this fantasy with Jacob but after seeing The Joker in Suicide Squad and growing sexually obsessed with his makeup, outfits and his psychotic berserk behaviour, I had to revisit it.’

Confession [x]


I hope this edit is good enough, amico mio! (/^▽^)/ I do photography myself and portrait photography is the one thing that I wish to master. I just know Jacob would be an excellent subject ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

~ Signora Paola

Miscellaneous

Seeing Jacob both in his 20s and in his 40s makes me wonder. I mean there must be a combination of both them. Right?! How would 30 years old Jacob look like? What do you think? (・・?

August 18, 2016

Frankly, I don’t think he’d look that different, although people back then tend to age faster. Not to mention he did spend some time in India, and the subsequent sun exposure could age him (and Evie) faster. Soooo here’s my rough estimation on how 30-year-old Jacob could look like

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I think his laugh and worry lines would be the first ones to show. It’d be interesting to know if he changed his hairstyle at this point. o/

~ Signora Paola

Confessions

August 18, 2016

‘I was just watching Hell’s Kitchen, and heard Chef Ramsay say: “Nedra, I want to see you on the menu.” If I’m quite honest here, I’d love to be on Ezio’s menu; as his appetizer, entrée, and dessert.’

Miscellaneous

To the anon who said that we need Jesus… I guess we should pay Father Jacob a visit hmm? ;)

June 11, 2016

Do prepare your proper confessional outfit before you embark on this quest, please

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*clears throat* Please form an orderly queue outside the confessional booth. Father Jacob will hear your sins shortly.

~ Paola, your Mother Superior

Confessions, Crossovers

June 8, 2016

‘Lost Girl AU where Jacob is the kinky goth mesmer and fucks you by controlling your hands to make you touch yourself and then uses you to get him off any way he wants, before letting you take complete control and loving how you dominate him.


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*coughs* Welp /o/

~ Signora Paola

Miscellaneous, Paola's Choice

May I get the blessing of Father Jacob? 😉

April 18, 2016
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Father Jacob blesses you and is ready to hear all your confessions. He’s even offering you wicked beautiful souls free baptisms.

~ Signora Paola, your mother superior

DACS Greatest Hits, Secluded Haystack

April 2, 2016

Well, someone is very happy to see that he’s dominating the Secluded Haystack at the moment, isn’t he. Jacob (x3) has even given us a rousing dance number just to show his appreciation. No food involved, unfortunately, but it’s all in the spirit of the Fiesta that’s going on right now ;D

From all of us here in La Rosa in Fiore we thank you very much for your support of the Haystack! Here’s to more dirty drabbles and hopefully more characters! Surely Signore Frye should share the limelight with someone else. And who knows – maybe he’ll dance with the others next time. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

~ Signora Paola

(Behold the video source and its official music video)

DACS Greatest Hits

Somebody place make a gif with the assassins heads attached to the dancers in Yatta!

March 20, 2016
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~ Signora Paola (who is now reminded of her nearly forgotten plans to do Assassin gifs of this video)

P.S. If you don’t hear from me within the next 12 hours, then assume that the Assassins have made me a target and have likely abducted me to pay for my many Photoshop crimes. Pray for me, my dear friends. (꒪ȏ꒪;)