Browsing Tag

porn star status update

Uncategorized

April 19, 2020

Confession count update + more

To our valued (and dearest) patrons,

I’ve been doing some little housekeeping in our bordello and I believe it is time to update you with our confession count. The last time we had this was 2 – yes, two years ago! Well, since our last update, let’s see how the rankings have changed, shall we?

  1. Jacob Frye – 1723 confessions (still the reigning king; and yes, this is still his theme song and I’d pay good money to hear Paul Amos sing it ~/o/)
  2. Connor Kenway – 971 confessions
  3. Shay Cormac – 563 confessions (oh my, he has overtaken Arno)
  4. Arno Dorian – 559 confessions (but he’s not too far behind!)
  5. Ezio Auditore – 520 confessions
  6. Evie Frye – 463 confessions
  7. Edward Kenway – 361 confessions (overtaken Altair)
  8. Altair Ibn La’Ahad – 357 confessions
  9. Haytham Kenway – 271 confessions
  10. Crawford Starrick – 257 confessions
  11. Desmond Miles – 214 confessions
  12. Bayek of Siwa – 73 confessions
  13. Alexios – 53 confessions
  14. Aveline de Grandpre – 48 confessions
  15. Kassandra – 45 confessions
  16. Adewale – 25 confessions
  17. Aya of Alexandria – 25 confessions

I’ve only included playable characters (with the exception of Crawford Starrick since he’s quite popular). If you want to know the confession count of a character not named here, please do send us a message!

I’ve also updated our Porn Star Status tag. To anyone who’s new to our bordello, it’s basically our “Greatest Hits” tag or the confessions that garnered 69+ notes 😉 Take a look if your favourite (or your own) confession is there!

I will also take this time to start restoring the posts that have been flagged by Tumblr. Since the main issue seems to be the images we used, then I think the best way to go about it is to simply blur the images and have them linked elsewhere. It’s a pain, but… ¯_(ツ)_/¯ It needs to be done!

Grazie for reading!
~ Signora Paola

Uncategorized

Ciao a tutti!

March 29, 2018

I miei amori! It is I, Claudia, at your service! After a long journey and many hardships I have returned once again to this, our beloved Bordello.

I have already done a few things for you, my dears:

1. The music player has been updated with more soothing music, including some from AC: Origins. Do let me know if you like them or want more added.

2. The Porn Star Status has been updated and, my oh my, you been very, very naughty while I’ve been gone. Please, do take a look~

3. The Characters’ Tag List has also been updated with the following:

As always, we eagerly await your confessions, sins and secrets; just remember to read our rules and check our FAQ. Keep sinning!

~Claudia

Uncategorized

May 20, 2017

To our valued patrons,

I have just updated our Porn Star Status tag and added several confessions that hit the magic 69+ note counts. Yes, the tag is littered with many Jacob confessions (what else can you expect from the King of Dirty Confessions™), but friendly reminder that the one confession that received the most number of notes (358!) is a Connor one followed closely by the Kenways-in-suits one, which is one of my personal favourites; I feel nostalgia every time I look at it because I made the edit when I was Sister Teodora. ;D

Grazie!
~ Signora Paola

Miscellaneous

April 7, 2016

Well, well. Look who’s dominating our Porn Star Status tag

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You can almost hear Signore Frye go, “Well, naturally.”

And here is where we are issuing a challenge to you, our dearest patrons who helped Jacob gain the coveted Porn Star Overlord rank: We would like you to make a fanart celebrating this occasion. It could be humorous take or, well, something that could surely do justice to the “porn star” title. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) You may submit to us or if you would rather post it in your own blog we would reblog it from you (just please remember to tag us so we would be able to see it).

Molte grazie and may this day fill you with many dirty thoughts, our beautiful sinners ♥️
~ Signora Paola

Let me also remind you that a confession reaches the Porn Star Status when it receives 69+ notes. So, it lies within you, our dearest patrons, to decide which confessions reach our most desired tag… Reblog & like your favorite confessions so they can achieve the Porn Star Status!

Happy sinning!
~Claudia

Miscellaneous

January 9, 2016

Yet again I have updated our Porn Star Status tag. I was feeling a little chipper and decided to go all the way back to this blog’s humble beginnings. This was the very first dirty confession apparently – a huge congratulations if it’s yours! ;D (If you must know my first ‘job order’ was this confession o/)

This has also made me wonder if I should continue with the male side of the dirty polls where we really let our imaginations run wild and speculate on the sizes of the male Assassins’ true hidden blades. Ehem. The original dirty polls were organised by our first Madame and I admit I miss the raunchy enjoyment these polls gave.

So please tell us what you think – should we or shouldn’t we? And any suggestion on how we can improve on these polls is very much welcome! <3

Grazie!
~ Signora Paola