‘I had a dream with Desmond, he was at the bar teaching me how to make the cocktails and kept close enough to me, while i made them and kept nibbling on my ear. I ended up being dragged into the office by Desmond where we ended up having sex through out our break. And everyone seemed to have heard us.’
‘Thanks to Paola, Sister Teodora, Mary Read, and Anne Bonny I have finally figured out that I am bisexual :)’
Confession by [x]
‘I like to call Ezio’s pene “The Extra Spicy Italian Sausage”–and I’m not even sorry. I also call Connor’s “The American Hotdog”; Altaïr’s will always be “The Hot Beef Shish Kebab”. Arno’s is obviously “The Baguette” or perhaps “The Frankfort”, seeing as he’s also Austrian. Haytham’s is “The Banger” since he’s English. I have yet to come up with a nickname for Edward’s…’
I told you I would do something special for you, anon. Although you nearly made me get in trouble for it thanks to mio marito looking over my shoulder when I was editing this…
–Signora Paola
“I like to imagine being trained by Altair and after a good beaten up in the training he would sneak into my room in Masyaf at night and made love to me so tenderly whispering every now and then “sorry” apologizing for the bruises and brusqueness, he would be a total sweetheart in bed. <3”
Art Credit:
“Is it bad that every time I make out with my boyfriend, I either imagine Ezio, Connor, or Adewale and occasionally, Charles Vane? I mean, really, either I’m getting too attached to fictional characters or I’m just not having enough feelings for this dude.”
Not at all, anon. No at all…
– Caterina
‘I wanna aggressively twerk to Lil’ Jon’s “Turn Down For What” all in front of Desmond’s face, right there on the bar table while he does his bartending thing. And then I’ll give him a lap dance to Nicki Minaj’s “Anaconda”. He better give me tips for doing this.’
This makes me wish Nolan North would do Desmond’s rendition of “My anaconda don’t want none” (the same way Connor’s VA Noah Watts did) ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°
~ Sister Teodora
‘Can I just say that the women of Assassin’s Creed have made me bisexual? I would give up bacon hamburgers for an orgy with Claudia, Teodora, Fiora, Maria, Rebecca, Lucy, the Lady Black and Elise. Oh, and don’t forget Paola, she’s my favorite ;)’
mod note: Paola very much appreciates this. 😉
‘I have a fantasy that Altair, Ezio, Arno and I are having a bath in one of the Roman style baths you find in AC1. Except it would be more sex and exploring each other’s kinks, than a bath. We would have to drain and refill the bath at least three times before we were properly clean.’
Confession by [x]
‘I’ve been taking belly dancing lessons lately to tone my hips and abs, after taking a two month break after surgery. I had a dream last night. I was in Altaïr’s room, there was spice, jasmine candles and incense, silk curtains and mountains of pillows and I’d made Altaïr sit on his bed while I belly danced for him. I tied his hands so he wasn’t allowed to touch me and eventually I started doing a strip tease, he couldn’t take anymore and begged me to fuck him. I gladly obliged. ;)’
‘I wish I could tie Malik down to the Bureau desk and ride him mercilessly, until he is begging me to let him cum and then Altaïr would walk in and join in. I’d be the happiest lady alive ohmygod.’
Art Credit [x]