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DACS Greatest Hits

DACS Greatest Hits

May 12, 2016

I can imagine your favourite assassin being the one who would mastermind everything. Now I’m not sure who among them would be the best cook lol keep Jacob away from the kitchen but the three best ones (IMO – Connor, Aveline and Arbaaz) would do all the food magic while Arno and Shao Jun help each other with the cake.

Ezio would be your charming host of the evening while Adéwalé would serve as your chaperone (can never be too careful when it comes to other drunk Assassins). Evie would serenade you with the piano and would fuss over the program and the logistics of the party (even if she’s not the one who masterminded it).

Edward and Desmond would take care of the drinks. Plenty of booze, of course. Desmond’s also bringing the karaoke machine. Everyone MUST sing or they don’t get to drink (each of them already has their own song listed here). Edward and Jacob would be hogging that machine ‘til the wee hours of the morning your neighbours are surely going to complain about all that racket.

Altaïr would be the one to give the toast. And then we have “surprise guests” Haytham and Shay offering expensive champagne and free tickets (for everyone) to some play. Everyone’s like WTF IT’S A TRAP but hey, it’s your birthday. Ceasefire is declared and the only “killing” they’re doing is killing each other in karaoke.

I hope these are sufficient, my dear. Happy birthday! ♥️

~ Signora Paola (who lives in a karaoke-crazy country so please excuse all the karaoke references /o/)


Let’s imagine your favorite assassin wants to make a surprise party for you, so he/she convinces the others to do it. Now here’s what each character would bring/do:

Altair, Shao Jun & Evie would work with the decoration and making your home ready for a party!

Aveline, Haytham & Ezio would get the pastries and the big cake into the scene!

Edward, Desmond & Jacob would bring booze, lots and lots of booze and other drinks for the guests.

Connor, Arbaaz & Arno would prepare the food: appetizers, entries, soups, and justa bout anything you like to eat.

Adéwalé & Shay would bring the music system, karaoke machine, bubble machine, lights and basically anything they can find to have the best rave in the street!

I hope you have a wonderful day, amore, and that you share it with all your loved ones!

~Claudia

DACS Greatest Hits

May 10, 2016

I looked for a dog breed that could be compatible to the character’s own personality (but I think they could all get along well with the breeds I mentioned) 😀 And I couldn’t resist – I have to use GIFs!

(more under the cut–warning: this is a super long post!)

Desmond: Golden Retriever – reliable, friendly, kind, confident, trustworthy

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Altaïr: Doberman Pinscher – alert, loyal, energetic, fearless, intelligent

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10/10 for that porkour

Ezio: Dachshund – lively, playful, devoted, clever, stubborn, courageous

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Connor: Great Dane – devoted, reserved, gentle, friendly, confident, loving

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So gentle to smaller creatures like Connor *sniff*

Aveline: French Bulldog – lively, playful, athletic, alert, easygoing, sociable

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Edward: Shiba Inu – charming, alert, faithful, confident, keen, fearless

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Now imagine Edward saying that

Adéwalé: Borzoi – athletic, gentle, quiet, respectful, intelligent, independent

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Shay: Siberian Husky – outgoing, alert, gentle, friendly, intelligent

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Haytham: Greyhound – even-tempered, athletic, gentle, quiet, intelligent

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And afraid of cats

Arno: Basset Hound – devoted, gentle, tenacious, friendly, sweet-tempered

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Shao Jun: Samoyed – lively, playful, alert, friendly, stubborn, sociable

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Arbaaz: German Shepherd – Watchful, alert, curious, confident, courageous

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Evie: Border Collie – alert, energetic, tenacious, responsive, intelligent

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Jacob: Pembroke Welsh Corgi – outgoing, playful, bold, protective, tenacious

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Now imagine all of them taking their dogs in a dog park. Or maybe they have their own Doggie Play Dates. Imagine the utter mayhem, holy shit. I think Jacob’s Corgi and Ezio’s Doxie would be the biggest troublemakers (something about those short legs).

Grazie for sending this ask! ♥

~ Signora Paola (who loves dogs way too much)


You’ll see I love big dogs… So, here they are!

Desmond: Pitbull – strong, intimidating, yet sweet. I can’t help but imagine him owning one and being super attentive of it, I mean look at that face!

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Altair: Saluki – independent and aloof; gentle and affectionate;

may seem reserved to strangers. Altair would take him for his morning jog always, then give him a nice treat.

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Ezio: Dalmatian – strong, energetic and curious. Ezio would use him to win ladies in the dog park for sure and would train him to do all sort of tricks. Who doesn’t love Dalmatians?

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Connor: Alaskan Malamute

Independence, resourcefulness, high intelligence. When Connor goes out camping/hiking, because he does, his faithful dog goes too. 

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Aveline: Komondor

it is calm and steady when things are normal, but defensive when needed. Just imagine Aveline walking this cutie thing! She would love to bath and play with it.

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Edward: Welsh Terrier

it is a happy, lively, and seldom shy or timid. Can have an attitude. Edward would so play with this dog till both of them were exhausted. Maybe so trips to the beach too.

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Adéwalé: Dachshund

Dachshunds are playful, but can be quite stubborn; great determination and ferocity. Adé little friend likes to put his head on his master’s lap while he reads.

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Shay: Irish Setter – active,

excellent companion & enthusiastic. Shay’s friend loves to go sailing with his master! Loves to get wet and sometimes drives Shay crazy!

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Haytham: Beagle – Intelligent

and determined. This dog would surely bring a smile to Haytham’s face as he approaches him with a toy to play.

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Arno: Papillon – symbol of fidelity and loyalty. Friendly and adventurous dog! Would go crazy each time Arno came home, jumping with happiness! And it would sleep in Arno’s bed too.

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Shao Jun: Akita

strong, independent

and calm. Sweet thing loves Shao Jun andplays with her all day if he can. It adores the treats she buys too!

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Arbaaz: Bull Terrier

independent and stubborn; courageous and  full of spirit. A gift from an English friend, Arbaaz really came to love this furry thing. He takes him for walks and plays with him too.

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Evie: English Cocker Spaniel – compassionate, determined, kind, intelligent, athletic, alert and resilient. While she reads and plays the piano,it would remain at Evie’s feet simply relaxing in it’s master’s presence.

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Jacob: Boxer

bright, energetic and playful;

slight reputation of being “headstrong”. Would go insane each time Jacob says “Playtime”. Insane. It would jump over him and tackle him just to keep him there.

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This is so I should go now and pet and play with my own doggie!

~Claudia


Connor: He’d own a Wolf-dog–kind of like the ‘Liger’ (made famous by Napoleon Dynamite, aha), the wolf-dog is a cross-breed between a Wolf, and a dog that whose heritage is close to wolves–for example, an Alaskan Malamute bred with an Arctic Wolf. An interesting thing to note is that wolves are actually very shy and timid animals by nature. Wolf crosses tend to retain this trait. They bond very strongly to their first owner, but are quite often shy of strangers. However, they are very outgoing and boisterous around pack members (including their human family). These both provide their own set of problems and requirements.

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If I ever owned a wolf-dog, I will certainly name it ‘Ratonhnhaké:ton’, as I think it’s very fitting and Connor tends to have these kinds of traits present in his character.

Shao Jun: the Shih Tzu–its royal heritage is something Shao Jun looks like she would own, given her own regal days in court.

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Aveline: the Louisiana Catahoula Leopard Dog–highly intelligent and energetic. Assertive but not overly aggressive; very even tempered.

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Adéwalé: Royal Bahamian Potcake–cautious, loyal, intelligent and laid-back.

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Elise: She’d own a poodle–frivolous looking but is actually quite intelligent, energetic and sociable. One of the most intelligent dog breeds and highly obedient. Warm and personable disposition.

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Haytham: He’d go for a Rottweiler–very devoted, obedient, and eager to work. They are confident, steady and fearless.

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Altaïr: A Saluki–aloof, but even-tempered and extremely loyal. Quiet dignity and independence.

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Edward: He’d own a Welsh Hillman–an ancient Welsh breed. Fast and fearless; precious with a proud legacy. A rarity that sadly went extinct in the 90s.

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Shay: Canadian Inuit Dog (qimmiq)–Loyal, alert, intelligent, independent, willful, mischievous, tough, brave, affectionate, gentle. It’s one of North America’s oldest and rarest remaining purebred dogs. Once a crown jewel of Canada, its kind is sadly in decline like the Welsh hillman (This is a shameless plug, but one worthy of a signal boost: please help save these majestic creatures; they are an important part of Canada’s heritage!)

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Ezio: I’d love to have a Volpino Italiano–they haven been known and loved by Italian nobility for centuries. They are spirited, lively, affectionate, playful, sociable, intelligent, loyal, and dedicated.

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– Ezio Auditore

DACS Greatest Hits

Hey Lovely ladies (and Ezio), how do you think each of the assassins (and templars) would start their sex? foreplay, positioning or right in?

May 1, 2016

IMO, I think all of them would have some kind of foreplay before the main event. ;D I think what I answered here could happen, so to make it different I’m going to use GIFs again 8D Putting this under the cut as always; apologies if you’re viewing this in our actual blog page (it seems that Tumblr finally added the ‘Keep reading’ link on mobile… at least when viewed on your Dashboard). Some of these are really bordering towards NSFW territory so be sure you won’t get into trouble ;D

Desmond: Would bite and kiss you all over

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Altaïr: Would push you towards the bed and devour you

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Ezio: Would tease your most erogenous spots

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Connor: Would run his tongue all over your body

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Aveline: Would leave hickeys on your most delicate spots

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Edward: Would engage in heavy petting before heading straight towards the goods

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Adéwalé: Would you offer to give you a massage first

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Shay: Would tease you underneath your clothes

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Haytham: Would undress you verrrrrrry slowly

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Arno: Would take his sweet time kissing and savouring you

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Shao Jun: Would zero in towards your goods and tease you

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Arbaaz: Would glide and trace his fingers all over your body

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Evie: Would be a huuuge tease and perform the art of frottage

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Jacob: Would sample you first which may turn into a full meal

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~ Signora Paola


I’ll be using gifs as well, since images can say more than a thousand words. Mie scuse to users browsing in our blog as well. I do hope you enjoy them!

Desmond: he would push you to a wall and start making out with you.

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Altair: he would put your collar and show off his dominance to you.

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Ezio: would strip you slowly, letting his hands caress your skin.

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Connor: his hands would get busy, making you shudder.

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Aveline: she would waste no time and undressing you, to have you.

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Edward: would not waste any time in groping your bits.

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Adéwalé: would use ice to make you needy with desire.

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Shay: would run his hands and mouth over your body, the anticipation building.

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Haytham: would show you the pleasure on impact play.

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Arno: would seduce you kissing the back of your neck and caressing your skin.

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Shao Jun: would kiss all of your skin, going for the erogenous zones.

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Arbaaz: would play with some food, before actually eating you.

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Evie: would go for the price quickly, making sure your more than ready for her.

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Jacob: would let you know how hungry he’s for you and eat you right up.

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~Claudia

DACS Greatest Hits

Thank you Signora Paola! OK then here is my first food question: how would you use the Philippine yema on our sexy Assassins/Templars (e.g. put it on Arno’s butt and lick it off :P)? Like think of the sexiest ways possible to do so. :P

April 28, 2016
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WELL I am very pleased to see more food porn asks. 8D I hope my answers don’t disappoint, my dear! (Since the yema can either be solid like a chewable candy or more of a filling – as is the case with yema-filled buns ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) – I’ll take these into consideration for each character)

Desmond: A candy in between his lips but he cannot eat it because you’d like to eat it yourself…. and then lick off any excess from his lips.

Altaïr: Pretend to feed him a candy, but once he tries to take a bite you withdraw and place it inside your mouth. You wouldn’t close your mouth though; you’d have your tongue out daring him to take it. When he tries to take it, you withdraw further back AND THEN you eat the damn thing. He’d be very frustrated with you mwahaha.

Ezio: Feed him a yema candy, but quickly kiss him to get a taste of it inside his mouth. 8D

Connor: Sticky filling all over his abs and maybe even his pecs. But never on the nipples, no. Who wouldn’t love to tease this wolf? I mean, imagine licking it off around it and driving him crazy. 8D

Aveline: Drip the filling on her legs and thighs then sloooooooowly lick your way upwards.

Edward: If you’d tease Connor by not licking his nipples, you’d drive Edward nuts by dripping that filling on his nipples and doing slow circular licks and occasionally using your teeth lightly. ;D

Adéwalé: Filling drizzled on his back, specifically, the indention of his spine. Slow and long lick that may extend up to the top of his ass. 8D

Shay: Lick a filling from his collarbone all the way to his neck and chin, then give him a taste by giving him a deep but brief kiss. Hurhur.

Haytham: Feign your most innocent and most puppy dog like expression and ask him to hand-feed you a candy… then nipping his finger in the process. ;D

Arno: Well you already mentioned licking it off his butt, soooo I’m gonna say I’d place several candies on top of his buns and picking each one off with your teeth and “accidentally” biting him in the process.

Shao Jun: A candy on her bellybutton (because I think she has a really cute one). You’d take a bite and nibble on the skin bellow her bellybutton, but you’d make her laugh by alternating it with blowing raspberries on it. ;D

Arbaaz: Drizzling the filling on his hipbones that would leave a sexy trail so close to his groin.

Evie: Several candies lined up on her cleavage. Because wouldn’t you want to bury your face on it and nom your way through that? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Jacob: “Accidentally” dipping his fingers into the sticky filling and offering to clean them. We know he has long fingers, so you can practise your, ehem, skills and see just how far you can take his fingers. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

~ Signora Paola

DACS Greatest Hits

If the Assassins/Templars were delicious desserts, what kind would they be and how would you…ravish them? Would you…eat them out fast…or savor the flavor? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

April 27, 2016

In case you want to make your own and name it after your favourite Assassin/Templar I’m linking to channels that I follow on YouTube. (A lot of them are also what you call “ASMR” videos ie., the only sounds you’ll hear are the sounds of mixing, etc. I find them really relaxing.)

Desmond: Oreo caramel microwave mug cake. The easiest and most accessible way to bake a cake is through the microwave *nods sagely* And I can’t think of a more American way than adding Oreo to it. I’d eat it when I really want to wind down after work~

Altaïr: “Magic” cake. So-called because it has three types of cake in one (sponge, custard and fudge). When I think of Altaïr I think of all the magic he does with his fingers. *coughs* And when I eat one slice I’ll eat each part carefully and see which I like best. ;D

Ezio: Tiramisu chocolate mousse. Just looking at the name makes me salivate tbh. I’d lap that up during Valentine’s Day.

Connor: Cinnamon roll. Because he IS the most cinnamon roll of all cinnamon rolls. I’d lick the cream first then nibble my way in. 8D

Aveline: Chocolate sponge with fresh ginger. Sweet and a little spicy. Oh, yes, That’s how I see Aveline. I’d nom my way through that.

Edward: Nutella chocolate muffins. Because nothing says “so sinful damn gimme more” than a chocolate cupcake with Nutella inside it. Heck, any food with Nutella should be associated with Edward.

Adéwalé: Hazelnut brownies. If Edward has Nutella, Adé has hazelnut. I’d quickly devour one and wouldn’t finish the whole batch right away. I’d make it last long. Ehem.

Shay: Mango pudding. I live in a tropical country that has a lot of mangoes and normally I eat them very messily (the “true” way of eating a mango is with your bare hands imo). But since we’re talking about desserts and not fruits I’d settle for a Shay mango pudding. Perhaps eat it in the same messy way. 8D

Haytham: Earl Grey cookies. I’ve never tried it, but it looks so damned good like me with Haytham tbh

Arno: Custard butt pudding. Yes, that is a custard pudding that is shaped like a butt. God bless the Japanese. I’d marvel at that butt pudding first before I’d eat it.

Shao Jun: Bubble tea. I’d sip that up until the very last drop (and chew on each tapioca ball).

Arbaaz: Chocolate souffle. I would pour my cream all over that *coughs*

Evie: No bake strawberry cheese cake. Because Evie to me would be less about sweetness and more of that zesty tang. Definitely would have more than one slice because I won’t be able to get enough of it.

Jacob: Salted caramel butter cookie. It’s Jacob so it has to have butter in it. *coughs* I’d lick the caramel centre first, of course. Slow little licks because I’d love to savour that salty sweet goodness. When I’m done I’d bring three or even the whole jar with me at work. You know, for snacks when I’m bored. *coughs*

– Signora Paola


Connor: HOT DOG OF FREEDOM. Okay not really a dessert, but I’ve been craving sausages all month ok? lol. I would….put my hand around the base, place my lips on the tip and then suck it in. L;KJA;LSKDJFA;LSDKFJ;l

Aveline: Ben-Yays. I’d chew on the softness and let the flavor melt in my mouth.

Desmond: Hershey’s chocolate kisses lol. Kiss those Hershey’s nippples~

Haytham: English Toffee. I’d bit on it hard, then just let it melt in my mouth.

Shao Jun: Red Bean Buns, yum! Hot and steamy, just how I’d like it~

I personally like to take my time and savor the flavor of any food I eat. ;P

– Ezio Auditore

DACS Greatest Hits

I got a question for you beautiful people; if the Assassins smelled amortentia (the love potion from Harry Potter) what do you think they would smell?

April 23, 2016

Let me give some context first for all those who haven’t read the harry potter series. Amortentia (from the Latin words amor, that means love & tentia, that means held) is the strongest love potion in the Harry Potter universe. When a person smells it has a different aroma for everyone who smells it, reminding each person of the things that they find most attractive. The person will fall in love with the person that administered the potion, but this love is not real just an illusion created by the potion, because love can’t be created or imitated, so to keep that person “in love” you’ll have to keep administering the Amortentia.

Now, based on this definition, here’s what I think each assassino would smell:

Desmond: orange peel & black licorice

Altair: black pepper & sweet alyssum

Ezio: neroli oil & basil

Connor:  incense cedar & lilacs

Aveline: leather & frangipani

Edward: gunpowder &  chocolate cosmos

Adéwalé: coconut pie orchic & tobacco

Shay: cinnamon & mahogany wood

Haytham: vanilla & amber

Arno: lavender & oak moss

Shao Jun: gardenia & myrrh

Arbaaz: star anise & ylang-ylang

Evie: sandalwood & ginger

Jacob: rosewood & jasmine

~Claudia


Connor: He’d smell like pine, with a hint of mesquite.

Jacob: sandalwood

Altair: Frankincense and Myrrh

– Ezio

DACS Greatest Hits

Because today is 4/20, who among the Assassins/Templars would you say smoke tobacco, weed, or vapor?

April 21, 2016

Sorry this is late; I wasn’t able to get on a computer all day until now–well I think Desmond for sure has tried some weed lol, and probably also tried to share it with the group, but only Rebecca agreed.

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Altaïr, and he’d probably make a terrible pun to Malik about them being…hashashins, and try to twist the word into hashishins, because hashish is pretty much weed, right? Trollolololol. Although, I think those two are more likely to prefer their own country’s hookah more than anything.

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Shao Jun, although like our Syrian hash…asshins, would probably prefer the stuff that’s ‘trending’ in her country, like…opium.

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I think Connor would be a straight-edge type of person, although he would probably make an exception for tobacco, but only if it’s used in the traditional, sacred way of his people.

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Haytham on the other hand, probably has no qualms smoking a cig or two. He’d probably be that fancy-ass, three-piece suited billionaire businessman carrying around the fanciest, most expensive cigs, like Nat Shermans or something

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He’d definitely smoke some Nat Shermans–black & gold label:

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Edward and Adewalé would be more into cigars, especially dem good Cuban cigars.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

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Aveline would probably just smoke tobacco out of pipes, particularly periques. For cigarrettes, she’d smoke American Spirit since it has perique in it, and probably use a cigarette holder to smoke cigs.

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Welp, none of us admins here personally smoke, but either way, here’s to 4/20!

– Ezio Auditore

DACS Greatest Hits

What kind of underwear, do you think, our assassins wear?

April 20, 2016

Desmond: boxers.

Connor: I think he likes to go commando, honestly…although maybe he has something to protect his crotch when he wears his Assassin outfit, kind of like those jock straps.

Aveline: a simple shift, especially for bedtime.

– Ezio


Claudia and I have combined our ideas and we’ve come up with these answers!

The brief wearers – classic, keeps everything in place

Desmond:

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Haytham:

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The boxer brief wearers – the R-18 kind AKA we’re using censors that don’t really do anything

Edward:

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Arbaaz:

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The trunk wearers – the PG-13 kind

Shay:

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Altair:

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The bikini briefs wearers – so saucy!

Arno:

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Jacob:

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That thong-th-thong-thong-thong – so scandalous!

Ezio:

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The jockstraps wearer – so cheeky!

Adéwalé:

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Goes commando – au naturale and it feels so good~

Connor:

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(Like Signore Ezio we think he’d go commando 8D)

And now for the ladies!

Aveline: Demi bra + boyshorts – spicy!

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Shao Jun: Strapless bra + tanga – full of mischief

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Evie: Sports bra + bikini panties – practical but foxy

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– Signora Paola