‘I’m so shamelessly voyeur. Tonight I came thinking about Jacob being my friend’s hot dad. I’d be over at her house for a sleepover, tossing and turning while she’s fast asleep. So I’d get up to use the loo, when I hear the faintest moan from behind her parent’s bedroom door. I don’t know what possesses me to do it, but I stand perfectly still in the hall, listening for more – I hear it. Jacob groaning, skin slapping skin, the mattress squeaking as the headboard rattles. Oh good lord, how hot.’